A ‘free space’ where you can be yourself: The story of Carla and her son Alejandro

In 2022 Asociacion PASMO met Alejandro, a young trans man and his mother Carla during a community outreach activity coordinated with Asociacion SOMOS in Guatemala to reduce stigma and discrimination. These activities, entitled “Espacios Libres” or ‘Free Spaces’, were designed by PASMO and implemented in Central America in coordination with other local NGOs. “Espacios Libres” aims to create safe spaces where community members can discuss, learn, and contribute to community transformation in favor of social inclusion for people who belong to the LGBTIQ+ community, people living with HIV, and other vulnerable populations.

Carla, madre, educadora y lideresa comunitaria, con su sonrisa amplia y cálida, afirma “Yo haría cualquier cosa por mi hijo hasta que pierda mis fuerzas”.  Carla, mother, educator, and community leader, with her wide and warm smile says “I would do anything for my son until I lose my strengths”. She learned about “Espacios Libres” through her role as Community Liaison at the Municipality of San Miguel Petapa, a peri-urban town just south of Guatemala City. She tells how a few years ago her son began a transition process as a transgender man and even though she didn’t know about the subject, she wasn’t surprised because she had noticed some behaviors in Alejandro that gave her clues about his real identity. 

With his rather deep voice, Alejandro is proud to tell the story of how he came out as a trans man despite the obstacles he faced. “Most people call us tomboys or lesbians, because they don’t have enough information, they don’t understand who we really are”, he says. With his rather deep voice, Alejandro is proud to tell the story of how he came out as a trans man despite the obstacles he faced. “Most people call us tomboys or lesbians, because they don’t have enough information, they don’t understand who we really are”, he says. expresa.

Alejandro siempre se sintió diferente a las otras niñas porque prefería pasar tiempo con los niños y jugar fútbol. Él recuerda cómo fue discriminado cuando asistía a la escuela “Las personas se reían de mi por ser una niña masculina con cabello corto.” Ever since a young age, Alejandro always felt different from the other girls. He always preferred to hang out with boys and play soccer. He remembers how he suffered a lot of discrimination at school. “People would laugh at me for being a masculine girl with short hair”. Given the lack of access to comprehensive sex education and information, Alejandro decided to do his own reseach on sexuality and gender identity and this opened the door for him to learn about transgender people. “My body has always been mine, but it was not complete”, describes Alejandro. Fortunately, he had the support of his mother Carla, a loving and strong woman who is a role model for him.. “Mi cuerpo siempre ha sido mío, pero no estaba completo”, describe Alejandro. Afortunadamente contaba con su madre Carla, una mujer amorosa y luchadora a quién él considera como un ejemplo a seguir.

Carl watched her son go through very difficult moments, but she wanted to show him that she was there for him. To show her unconditional support and love, she decided to take him shopping for masculine clothes that allowed him to feel himself. “I never lost a daughter, I just gained a happy and confident son in his new identity”, she remembers with excitement. “Yo no perdí una hija, yo gané un hijo feliz y seguro con su nueva identidad”, recuerda con mucha emoción.

After he felt comfortable being himself and having his mother’s support Alejandro knew there was a community he could belong to and contribute to it in a positive way. That’s why he decided to begin “Colectivo Metamorfosis” in his community. The collective is dedicated to help other trans men to understand their identity, to accompany them in their transition and to promote for their human rights.

When his mother Carla participated in “Espacios Libres”, Alejandro felt happy to find a safe place where he could tell his story and talk about his identity with other people. Carla also learned a lot of things, but the most important was having the chance to talk openly with her son even more than before and they could understand how the other person lived each side of the story. Their relationship and their family has become stronger and more powerful through these actions. “Listening, understanding, and supporting are the most important things that a parent should give their children. I just want my son to reach the top!” “Escuchar, ayudar y apoyar son las cosas más importantes que una madre o un padre debe hacer por sus hijos. Y yo quiero que mi hijo llegue lejos”.

Alejandro and Carla found a free space to learn and grow together, to have an inclusive family, community and society as part of Asociacion PASMO’s efforts under USAID’s Prevention Services against HIV project in Central America.

Get to know more about ‘Espacios libres’ here!